Tuesday, April 24, 2018

Bra Check

Dear Connor,

One of the running gags in the Captain Underpants books is the way the main characters rearrange the letters on their school billboard so that it says something inappropriate. You were reading your newest Underpants book this morning and we had this resulting conversation:

You: Mommy, what is a "free bra inspection"?
Me: Uhhhh, I guess it's when you check girls' bras for free.
You: Check them for what?
Me: Ummm . . . bugs or dirt.
You: Oh.

Maybe I should be reading these Captain Underpants books first before I let you read them!

Love,
Mom

Monday, April 23, 2018

Bookworms

Dear Connor,

You began reading on your own shortly after you turned 5 years old and you have grown into such a voracious reader, which has made me so proud. You love getting books as presents and look forward to our trips to the library. I catch you reading dozens of times every day: before breakfast, after breakfast, when you're waiting for Daddy to take you to school, when you come home from school, before dinner, after dinner . . . you get the picture! And you are a fast reader. I gave you a copy of Pippi Longstocking on Saturday and you had finished it two hours later!

Your favorite series are Magic Tree House, Boxcar Children (I read that one when I was your age!), Diary of a Wimpy Kid and especially Captain Underpants (what 7-year-old boy can resist all that potty humor? :-P ). You also like the My Weird School books and The Baby-Sitters Club graphic novels (I loved the BSC series when I was in elementary school and while it's cool that you now read them, too, it's funny/interesting/sad that they turned my beloved books into comics).

MuiMui learned how to read on her own this year and she shares your big appetite for books. She loves the Fancy Nancy series and also likes DC Super Hero Girls, The Baby-Sitters Club and Captain Underpants. And while I couldn't be happier that I am raising such great readers, I don't like how hard it can be to get you guys to, well, stop reading. I went to the library today while you were in school and picked up Captain Underpants and Fancy Nancy books that you and MuiMui hadn't read yet. I put them on the foyer bench and when you two came home and saw them, you were so excited! You and MuiMui scooped them up and thanked me with huge grins on your faces. You then both sat on the bench and read for an hour. A whole hour! And it would have been longer but I said you guys needed to shower and start your homework. Then I said it again and I said it a third time and neither of you could tear yourselves away from the new books! In our house, I actually have to yell the ridiculous-sounding threat, "If you don't stop reading, you're going to be in big trouble!"

Haha! But I will take it. There are worse things than trying to get you guys to put down a good book!

Love,
Mom

Thursday, April 19, 2018

15 Questions

Dear Connor,

For fun, I asked you a series of questions and these were your unedited responses:

What is something I say a lot?
Ignore her and eat your food.

What makes me happy?
When I listen. (SO TRUE.)

What makes me sad?
When I'm not nice to you.

How tall am I?
Like 2 or 3 feet. (That would make me shorter than you at this point!)

What is my favorite thing to do?
Read.

What is my favorite food?
Sushi.

What is my favorite drink?
Soda. (But I drink it like once a month!)

If I could go anywhere, where would I go?
Baltimore. (Ummm, not quite.)

How do I annoy you?
When you don't answer me.

What is my favorite TV show?
Jane the Virgin. (It is SO GOOD!)

What is my favorite music to listen to?
The girl with the thing, the weird thing on her face. (You meant Sia; when her songs play on my iPad, it shows the album cover where she has a strange pig-like nose.)

What is my job?
Magazine writer. (It was a lifetime ago.)

How old am I?
32. (Close enough.)

What is my favorite color?
Purple.

How much do you love me?
As big as the galaxy. (Ditto!)

Love,
Mom

Monday, April 16, 2018

Super Star

Dear Connor,

Your teachers pick a "Star of the Week" every week and on Friday, they picked you! As Star of the Week, you were entrusted with Boris the Bear, your teacher's teddy bear. You brought him home for the weekend and took him wherever you went. Then you wrote about your adventures in the shared class journal. I read the journal and Boris has been everywhere from Bryant Park to Chuck E. Cheese; he even accompanied one of your classmates on a long weekend trip to Philadelphia (btw, your super germophobe mama slightly cringed every time you touched Boris because while Boris was cute, he also did not look like he had been washed in awhile). On Saturday, Boris came with us while we went to the dentist, had lunch at Panera and picked up some things at Target.

Our Target run with Boris was the best and I will tell you why! You put Boris in the child's seat in the shopping cart and strapped him in. Then while we were shopping, you came with me to get cereal from the food section of the store while Daddy went to the cleaning supplies section. I didn't even think about it but that meant Daddy, a grown man, was on his own in Target and pushing a teddy bear around in his shopping cart. Hahahaha! Daddy pointed out what a funny sight he had been after we met up again and he told us how a couple had walked by him, pointed at Boris and said, "He's cute!" Hahahaha! That made me laugh for so, so long!

You were so excited to hang out with Boris this weekend and I am so happy with my Star of the Week!

Love,
Mom

Sunday, April 15, 2018

Lost Boy

Dear Connor,

GongGong and PoiPoi were babysitting yesterday and they LOST* you!

*Well, technically, they didn't lose you because you weren't even home with them! But they thought you were! Daddy and I had to run some errands yesterday morning so I asked your grandparents to watch MuiMui and DiDi. I told PoiPoi that Daddy and I were going to take you with us so that they would only have to watch two kids. She didn't hear me, though, so when we left, she and GongGong were playing with MuiMui and DiDi in the attic and they thought you were in your room studying for the math test you have tomorrow.

You, Daddy and I left the house at 10am. At 10:26am, I received a text from GongGong: "Did you take Connor with you?" My jaw actually dropped because:

a) I couldn't believe they didn't know where you were
b) TWENTY-SIX minutes had passed before they realized that you weren't in your room!

Once I got over the initial shock, I started laughing at the ridiculousness of your grandparents and asked Daddy, "Should I mess with them? No, I shouldn't mess with them. But I should totally mess with them!" So because I am a bit cruel, I texted GongGong back and was all, "What are you talking about? Connor is at home!" GongGong then called me and was super frantic until you called out from the backseat, "I'm in the car!" Hahahaha! After we hung up, I started laughing and couldn't stop for several minutes!

When we got home, MuiMui told me, "PoiPoi and GongGong were freaking out. They were yelling, 'Connor! CONNOR!!'" Oh man, silly PoiPoi and GongGong!

Love,
Mom

Thursday, April 12, 2018

Same Names

Dear Connor,

On the walk home from school today, we realized that you have a classmate named Logan who has a younger sister named Lila and Lila has a classmate named Logan who has a younger brother named Connor. Haha! We should have named Sawyer Logan :-P

Love,
Mom