Dear Connor,
You like sleeping next to Mommy and Daddy. And Mommy and Daddy like sleeping next to you, too. We can cuddle underneath the blanket, hear your cute baby snores and watch your round little tummy rise and fall as you breath in and out. But we can't let you sleep next to us. A pillow or blanket could cover your face. One of us could roll over on top of you. You might wake up while we are still sleeping and decide to crawl off the side of the bed. So sleeping with us, no matter how warm and snuggly, is no good.
I tried explaining this to you, but you didn't care. For months, you cried as soon as we put you in your crib at night and wouldn't stop until we brought you into our bed. So we let you sleep with us because then all three of us (and our neighbors, who can hear everything through our inconveniently thin walls) could get some rest. But it had to stop. And so this week, Mommy and Daddy decided to do what all parents of young babies dread: We would let you cry it out.
Daddy was under the assumption that the cry it out (CIO) method meant that we would put you in your crib, let you cry until you fell asleep and then get you in the morning. Yeah, not so much. Since doing that would probably scar you for all of eternity, I took a gentler approach. We went through your usual bedtime routine: bath, books, goodnight kisses and hugs. I put you in your crib. You cried. I patted your tummy, said goodnight and left the room. The books I read said to then check in on you every 10 minutes, comfort you for 1-2 minutes and leave the room even if you are still crying. I was supposed to do this until you fell asleep. I had watched a video on CIO sleep training and in the video, the baby falls asleep on his own in half an hour. On the first night we did CIO, you cried for THREE HOURS. I went into your room every 10 minutes and you were always standing up, holding onto the side of the crib and crying like a, well, baby. Exhausted and worried that I was causing permanent damage, I caved and brought you into our bed. You fell asleep in a second.
Night Two: You cried for three hours, I caved.
Night Three: You cried for an hour. After an hour, you stopped crying. On the video monitor, I saw you sitting up but your eyes were drooping and your head was bobbing down, down, down . . . You jerked your head up. But then it started to bob down, down, down . . . until you jerked your head up again. Stubborn boy! You wanted to fall asleep but you kept fighting it. Until sleep eventually won out and you actually fell asleep sitting up. I tiptoed into your room and laid you on your back.
Night Four: Success! I put you in your crib. You cried. I left the room. You stopped crying after a few minutes. You again tried to fight sleep but soon fell asleep sitting up.
Night Five: You cried a little longer when I left your room tonight but you stopped after about 10 minutes. On the video monitor, I watched you sit down and then tumble onto your tummy and fall asleep.
Yay! We did it!
Love,
Mom
