Mr. Personality

Dear Connor,

How much does a person's personality change over a lifetime? If you're an active toddler who loves to run and jump, will you be into sports when you're in high school? PoiPoi says I was a shy, quiet, well-behaved little kid and now that I'm 30, I'm still pretty shy, quiet and well-behaved (no speeding tickets or arrests on my record, thankyouverymuch!). What are you going to be like when you get older? We have no way of knowing but here are some of your main personality traits now: 

-Playful: You love to smile, laugh, play and goof around. You love getting tickled and crack up whenever I make silly faces and funny sounds. One of your favorite games is covering your face, saying "uh-oh" and smiling slyly when I realize that you've "disappeared." I call out, "Connor! Where did Connor go? Has anyone seen Connor?" and you uncover your face and laugh when I look surprised and say, "There you are!"

-Funny: You still make me laugh with your hilarious Connor-isms. For example, I am trying to teach you how to say your name but when I ask you what your name is, you point to your chest and say, "Me!" Also, when I say it's time to go to sleep, you fake snore and say, "Gaaaw chee, gaaaw chee."

-Affectionate: You love to hug and kiss me and Daddy, your friends, your friends' parents and your stuffed animals. When you want a hug, you hold your arms out toward someone and say, "Hug!" There have been a few times, though, that you've reached out toward someone and when he/she goes to hug you, you suddenly change your mind and turn away. That's just cold, dude. 

 <--- Going in for a kiss

-Empathetic: If you hear another kid crying, you immediately stop what you're doing, look at the distraught kid and get upset, too. You start whimpering and fake crying, I guess because you are feeling the other kid's pain. We were in Barnes & Noble the other day and when you heard a baby crying, you ran through all of the aisles until you found her. It's really sweet that you care so much about others and your empathy is a trait I hope you'll always have.

-Super Smart: You know how to say a few dozen words but you can identify more than a hundred objects when I ask you to point them out in your books. You know most of your numbers, shapes, foods, animals, vehicles and--most importantly--your Sesame Street characters. 

-Elmo Lover: Speaking of Sesame Street characters, you LOVE Elmo. When you were a newborn, Daddy and I could always get you to stop crying if we sang, "Elmo's Song." It was like a magic switch that instantly calmed you down. "Elmo" was also one of your first words and I recently bought you an Elmo music CD that you now want to listen to ALL OF THE TIME. We seriously listen to the entire CD at least three times a day and you always request it by running over to our stereo and chanting, "Elmo! Elmo! Elmo! Elmo! Elmo!" It's gotten to the point where I have to tell you that Elmo is sleeping and will sing for you later (the first of what I assume will be many white lies I am going to tell you over the years). 

-A Little Lazy: You can hold your own bottle when you drink your milk. You can climb up the stairs and walk down them, too, when I hold your hand. But you often insist that I hold your bottle for you and carry you up and down the stairs. Sorry, buddy. You're not a baby anymore!

-Physically Fearless: You can now climb onto the couch, rocking chair and dining table chairs with complete ease. But it doesn't stop there. Having mastered those domains, you have started climbing onto the top of the couch, the armrests of the rocking chair and from the dining table chairs to the actual dining table when I am not looking. You can imagine how many heart attacks I have now.

 <--- My little daredevil

-Peanut Butter-Averse: Peanut butter is one of the best foods ever. It is perfect on cinnamon raisin toast, in cookies, as frosting for a chocolate cake and straight out of the jar. I don't know anyone who doesn't like peanut butter. Except you. I've fed it to you a few times and you always reject it. I hope that changes. Sad is a childhood with no peanut butter and jelly sandwiches!

-Total Mama's Boy: Mommy is still your #1. Your face lights up like a Christmas tree when you see me and when you're scared or have a booboo, it is me you always run to for hugs and kisses. And when someone else hugs me, you get really upset, turn red, start screaming and try to push the other person away. Then you jump into my lap and hold me super tight. A bit possessive, are we?

So far, you are turning out to be an amazing little man. We'll work on the peanut butter thing.

Love,

Mom

Surprise, Surprise

Dear Connor,

Ever since you were born, many people have asked me what are the most surprising things about motherhood. Here are my top five:

5) The unbelievable amount of baby products available to moms these days

-The first time Daddy and I stepped into a Babies 'R' Us to start shopping for you, we had to leave after 10 minutes because there was just So. Much. Stuff. You want a baby bathtub? There are plastic ones, inflatable ones, ones with slings, ones with rubber seats, ones with motorized water jets to create freakin' whirlpools (really!). When we asked a store employee about strollers, he asked us if we were looking for a lightweight stroller, an umbrella stroller, a jogging stroller or a stroller travel system. Um, isn't there one where we can just put the baby in and push it? From baby monitors to something as simple as a pacifier, there are a million different brands, models and styles of everything and doing the exhaustive research to pick the "right" one is a huge pain in the butt. And in addition to the things I knew I needed (crib, high chair, bottles), I have discovered tons of baby products that no mom will ever need. A womb noise machine? A diaper wipe warmer? And my personal favorite, Pee-Pee Teepees? Seriously??

4) I have to suck your boogers out of your nose

-Before I became a mom, I never thought about babies' boogers. But babies obviously have boogers, too, and while I can use a tissue to blow the boogers out of my nose, you have yet to acquire this life skill. So until then, I have to get your boogers out for you and I have to do it by sticking one end of this thing called a "snot sucker" in your nostril, sticking the other end in my mouth and literally using my breath to suck out your boogers. The sucker is designed in such a way that your snot gets trapped in a little tube and cannot get sucked all the way into my mouth. It's one of the oddest things I've ever seen and I still feel weird using it but it does work really well and I think it's one of the most ingenious baby products ever invented, as opposed to, say, Pee-Pee Teepees.

3) I have to do laundry almost every other day

-You're tiny. Your clothes are tiny. Yet your dirty laundry piles up faster than I ever expected. Parents always talk about the sleepless nights, the constant feedings, the loss of their social lives. But no one told me how much friggen' laundry such a small little person goes through. When you were a newborn, I sometimes had to change your outfit five times in one hour because you were constantly spitting up or having oh-so-fun poop explosions. Now, your clothes are always covered in food or dirt from playing outside or you've peed/pooped so much overnight that it soaked through your diaper and onto your clothes and sheets. Thank god we have a washer and dryer in our basement, or else I'd have to buy a timeshare at the laundromat down the block.

2) I can now talk about poop. A lot.

-I would never in a million years tell anyone about my poop. There is just no reason to ever go there. But when it comes to your bowel movements, I have no qualms about discussing them with your dad, your grandparents, the mom I meet at Barnes & Noble. I have had lengthy discussions with my mom friends about the color, shape, consistency and frequency of our kids' number twos and it is a completely acceptable topic of conversation in parental circles. When Daddy comes home from work, sometimes the first thing I say to him is something like, "Connor pooped today and it was shaped like a big Hershey's Kiss!" And instead of cringing in horror and disgust, Daddy will laugh because that is our life now. Hershey's Kiss-shaped poop.

1) And the #1 biggest surprise about motherhood? That I don't always enjoy it.

When we've gone out, there have been many times when some stranger has smiled at us, said something about how precious parenthood is and told me, "Enjoy it." And I do. Daddy and I tried to get pregnant for many months and I know how immensely lucky we are that you came along. I love being your mom. But sometimes I don't. When you were a newborn who cried so much that I didn't have time to eat, sleep or even shower, I didn't enjoy that. When you won't let me change your diaper and keep trying to fling yourself off of the changing table, I don't enjoy that. When it's time to leave the park and you don't want to go so you throw a temper tantrum, scream your head off and refuse to get in your stroller, I really don't enjoy that. Being a mom is not all sunshine and rainbows and snuggles in bed and I had no idea that there would be times that I'd be so frustrated, so irritated, so angry and so annoyed that I'd go into the bathroom just to get away from you and cry. But that's the funny thing about motherhood. You'll smile at me, give me a kiss or say "Sorrrr" and hug my leg and all is forgiven and forgotten. Despite all of the bad parts, I really do love being a mom and I love you more than anything. And that's no surprise at all.

Love,
Mom

Word Explosion

Dear Connor,

I like to talk. A lot. There have been many a night when Daddy is tired and just wants to go to sleep but he can't because I am laying next to him in bed, blabbing away about funny things you did that day or an interesting story I saw on the news or a random tidbit that someone just posted on Facebook (may you never become addicted to Facebook--or even know what Facebook is). I am a chatterbox, which is a quality I have seemingly passed onto you because you have been quite the talker ever since you were about three months old. Back then, you would spend hours uttering nonsensical things like "Gadoo a gur duh." But then you said your first word ("mama"!) when you were almost a year old and you have been picking up new words ever since, especially during these past two months when you have suddenly learned a slew of new words. They include: 

-no more (you always hold your palms up when you say this, too), egg, ball, share, hug (you request one by saying "hug" and stretching your arms out to people), whoa, two, five, eight, the letters V and X, car, truck, hat, shoes, feet, ears, mouth, circle, oval, down, over there, moo, meow, neigh, tutu (turtle), book, cake, hot, go, outside, key, bot (for robot) and baby

One key phrase that you have recently learned is "no no touch" because I probably say it to you so much (will you please stop trying to play with the stove knobs whenever we're in the kitchen??). It's especially funny when you're near something you know you're not allowed to touch--like Daddy's phone--because you'll point at it, shake your head and say, "no no touch" over and over again. That's right, little guy! Thanks for being so obedient!

You have learned a few words in Cantonese as well:

-gai dan (egg), fa fa (flower), sui sui (water), sai sow (wash hands), PoiPoi (when PoiPoi calls and you hear her voice on the phone, you shout out "PoiPoi" and she loves it every time!), bao bao (bread) and my personal favorite: ai yah. That last one officially makes you Chinese, hehe :)

And these are technically sound effects rather than words, but you also say "uh huh" (you went from saying "no" to everything I ask you to saying "uh huh" to everything), "achoo" after someone sneezes or coughs (even if it's you!) and "awww" when you hug me or your stuffed animals. Too cute!

Love,

Mom 

Forget Me Not

Dear Connor,

On Friday, we went to the grocery store, where I bought a basket of groceries, paid for said groceries and then walked out of the store without those groceries. I was wondering why the cashier was shouting at me! Then today, we went to Rite-Aid, where I again paid for my items and walked away from the register without them. Oh man, mommy brain is in full force. But as long as I never have a brain lapse and leave a store without you, I think we're in good shape!

Love,
Mom

Mama's Day

Dear Connor,

There was sunny, 80-degree weather. There was a walk on the rocks along the East River. There were fluffy blueberry pancakes and pumpkin whoopie pies. There were bubbles floating in the air. And there was the sound of your laughter as Daddy and I chased you around the park. Thank you for a perfect Mother's Day. 

Love, 

Mom

Butterfly Forest

Dear Connor,

When we went for a walk today, we saw a couple of beautiful black and orange butterflies flitting about in the air. As we walked further, we saw about a handful of butterflies, then more than a dozen and then we walked by what must have been a butterfly habitat because we were suddenly surrounded by about 50 butterflies! I had never seen so many butterflies at once in our neighborhood and it felt as if we'd stepped into a dream! One little butterfly even landed on your nose, which you found incredibly amusing. I wish I'd been able to take a picture. That once-in-a-lifetime image of your eyes lighting up--and crossing slightly--when the butterfly touched down on your nose and flapped its delicate wings was pretty awesome.

Love,
Mom

Boy In Trouble

Dear Connor,

When you've done something bad and I tell you to apologize, you hang your head, look down at the floor and morosely say, "Sooorrr." You look like such a sad little puppy dog that I can't even get mad at you!

And when you've done something so bad that I do yell at you, you have this habit of instantly avoiding eye contact. Sometimes you turn away from me and sit or stand perfectly still, as if I'm a bear and you're trying to ward me off. Other times, you do this weird thing where you close your eyes but repeatedly flutter your eyelids ever so slightly. Nice try, little guy. You may not see me, but I see you and you are in trouble! 

Love,

Mom

Refined Palate

Dear Connor,

Over the weekend, we went to a food event where you tried oxtail consomme for the first time and you loved it! Tonight, I tried feeding you spaghetti and meatballs for dinner and you wouldn't even take one bite. Are spaghetti and meatballs too ordinary for you now, Mr. Fancy Pants? :P

Love,
Mom

We All Look Alike

Dear Connor,

I have been meeting a lot of other moms in our neighborhood and you recently became friends with two little girls named Hailey and Chelsea. Both of them are two months older than you, both of them are super cute (which you seem to think, too, because you're always trying to hug and kiss them!) and both of them are Asian. We've had several playdates with each of them but last week, we went to the Brooklyn Children's Museum with Hailey and her mom and you kept calling Hailey Chelsea. And today, Chelsea's mom told me that Chelsea recently pointed at an Asian boy and called him Connor. I guess all Asians do look alike--even to toddlers!

Love,

Mom